May 19, 2016
I did a lifestyle session and ended up having lunch after with a client, who has turned into more of a girlfriend, at her house the other week. Her family has always been one of my favorites to watch grow and we’ve become such close friends over time. We talk about all aspects of life and my cheeks hurt from smiling and laughing so hard every time I leave her. We sit for an enjoyable hot minute, you know, having that dream mom to mom adult conversation, but usually after about 10 minutes, we’re standing (and usually yelling our conversations to each other from room to room) while we chase kids around. By the time we get into a strong conversation, it gets interrupted with answering the kids’ questions and we literally never get to finish a conversation. This could go on for a few hours… as we both clean up different messes while the kids are still playing.
For so many of us, there is so much time spent on cleaning up throughout the day, how we feel the need to constantly have a clean house for unexpected guests or to have ready at that very moment when our spouse comes home from work. Oh, how wonderful it feels at the end of the night when everything is put away in it’s ‘spot’ and I can go to bed knowing there is peacefulness until it starts again tomorrow. I think a lot of it for me, has to do with my son getting older now. As hectic as we are as a household still, that baby stage for me, is gone, (and no, I’m not ready to talk about that situation) which has left me with more time to allow ‘OCD’ through the door a little bit more than planned. I mean, I clean up while he’s playing. It’s bad. And then that’s when she said something that hit so close to my heart, because I always thought the same thing as Owen was growing up, and it put my mind at ease a little bit and helped get me back to where I always have been.
“I like it though,” she said. “…at the end of the night when there is a mess, a big one, it just means my kids weren’t bored, they were happy and exploring and imagining. The toys are happy and being played with and not just sitting in a spot on a shelf only because that’s the way we like it. A mess means happiness, joy, and growth.”
I step on at least 5-10 action figures per day, even in the shower. I play with at least 40, usually the same favorites, including all of their castles and ships and buses and houses that they all like to play and live in. We play during my morning coffee, while trying to work at my desk, while folding laundry, and during meals they usually get to eat with us. They are lined up everywhere around the house and we usually have to pick and choose only a few to take with us in the car each day. I could go on and on about this topic, as I’ll probably have to come back to in the future. But for now, it’s just a little reminder to relax. Don’t stress yourself out so much over a mess.
Messes mean happiness, and your children are only making memories.
Someday, that mess simply won’t be there. And you’re going to miss it.